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Post by Lezzi on Mar 12, 2012 21:09:38 GMT -5
Polaris was pacing quickly, biting her nails and trying hard not to scream, cry, hit something, or all of the above at the same time. She was scared, angry, worried, upset. she couldn't believe that she had let something this serious happen to herself. She had found out the day after Shawn left her to let her rest from her head wound; her stomach had been hurting terribly and Annie insisted she take a test (the poor girl knew too much about her older sister). When it came back positive, the red head sat on the bathroom floor with Polaris for an hour and a half to let her cry herself to sleep. Annie was having a baby too, but that wasn't what worried Polaris. A baby scared her, sure, but support and help for that couldn't overcome her fear of having to tell Shawn. It was his, there wasn't any doubt about that.She was angry with him for saying that it wouldn't happen, worried that he may abandon her altogether, and completely terrified that he may do something drastic. She didn't know what he could do, but she was still frightened nonetheless.
she had refused to speak to him for a week and a half, ignoring his phone calls, demanding nobody let him in the house and completely avoiding him. Nadi eventually cracked Annie into telling about it and despite Caris being a little upset that Polaris hadn't told her, she demanded that Polaris call Shawn. She did regretfully and told him to meet her in the forest immediately. So here she was, close to tears and loud profanity, praying he would show up in a good mood or at least not angry with her for ignoring him. Waiting, however, was something Polaris hated most. And if she had to wait any longer, she thought to herself, she was just going to leave and never speak to him again.
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Post by Tori on Mar 12, 2012 21:32:05 GMT -5
After not being able to see or even talk to Polaris for what seems like months made Shawn pretty irritable. And whats worse, was that the last time they had seen each other was when he admitted to actually liking her. They haven't even gone on that date Shawn wanted to take her on. No matter how many times he had called or texted her, she hadn't responded, not once. No one would even let him in the house since then. Did she not like him back? Did her family finally ban him from ever seeing or even speaking to Polaris again? He didn't know. That is, until he got that voicemail from Polaris the other day. What did she want? To "break up" with him? They haven't even officially gone out yet. Either way, Shawn was willing to meet up with her, whatever the cost. He gathered his lighter and cigarette pack, strapped his wallet to his chain in his back pocket, and headed to the forest where she was waiting on him.
When he arrived there, he noticed her right away, leaning up against a tree just at the entrance of the forest. She didn't look herself though. Something wasn't right. Why did she have him meet her here? She must have something to tell him. But what? He casually strolled over to the white-haired girl with his hands in his pockets and the same blank expression on his face. "So, you finally decided to talk to me again, eh?" he said coldly.
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Post by Lezzi on Mar 12, 2012 21:50:05 GMT -5
Polaris must have jumped a mile high, screaming even though she had tried to control it to a gasp. "Scare the shit out of me why don't you!" She yelled at him, then realized he didn't even know something was the matter yet. She suddenly got cold feet, her heart racing in her chest. Every word she had planned, the speech she had thought out, the advice she was given, everything had flown from her mind and she was left blank. 'I....you...we..." She turned away quickly, not knowing what to do. "Sorry." She said softly, not even sure he heard her. She didn't know what she was supposed to say, how she was supposed to start this off. Do I tell him or just work into it? Hit him or force him to hold me? Try to laugh it off or just burst into hysterics so he'll listen? Everything rushed through her mind at full speed and she couldn't control any of it. She didn't know at to do or what to tell him.
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Post by Tori on Mar 12, 2012 21:57:09 GMT -5
Even with the sudden scream, all Shawn managed to do was raise his eyebrows at her, as if saying, Do you really want to start another fight right now? When she started sputtering out random words then, his eyebrows furrowed in deep, not sure of what to make of this meeting now. "Polaris..what the hell are you trying to say? Just...spit it out." he sighed then. Of course she wasn't making any sense. He was probably just making this harder for her. For both of them to speak to each other. So he tried again. "Look. I'm not mad. I'm just anxious as to why you haven't been answering any of my calls or texts...or why I haven't been allowed to come over lately. Honest. I'm not mad. Not at you, anyway." he mumbled out the last part.
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Post by Lezzi on Mar 12, 2012 22:06:37 GMT -5
Polaris almost glared at him when he raised his eyebrows. She knew that look and it was just her nature to get defensive. But she kept her mouth shut until he started speaking again. She bit her lip, bouncing slightly on her toes. She looked at him, finally figuring out a bargain that might help her. "Just...i-I need you to do me a favor." She chewed on her lip, thinking of how to word it correctly. "Promise....you wont get upset....and that you'll help me." She looked up at him, not sure he'd take it. She knew that he'd said he liked her, but she knew that didn't mean he'd stay in once place for too long.
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Post by Tori on Mar 12, 2012 22:17:48 GMT -5
He nodded slowly, agreeing to the favor that hasn't been explained yet. "Well, what kind of favor do you need from me?" he was getting pretty nervous now, as to what kind of favor Polaris would need from him. Especially one of which she had to make him promise not to get upset about. Shawn's insides were getting pretty shaky now, but he didn't dare show it on the outside. "I'm not mad. I'm not gonna get upset. Just..." he let out a more frustrated sigh, "tell me, Polaris. Now."
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Post by Lezzi on Mar 12, 2012 22:22:16 GMT -5
After chewing on her lip some more, searching his face for any sign that he was lying, she finally threw her face in her hands and said very quickly. 'I'm pregnant." She couldn't bare to repeat it, sinking to her knees as she leaned against the tree. It took everything in her to let no more than a single tear from each eyes to fall and she quickly brushed those away. she didn't want to look at him and she almost wished he would go away. her heart felt like it was going to rip out of her chest any second and her lungs gave her the urge to scream until she could't speak anymore. She couldn't tell if saying it out loud to him made her feel better or worse and now all she could do was wait for his answer. And waiting was something Polaris hated most.
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Post by Tori on Mar 12, 2012 22:29:35 GMT -5
After a long wait of silence, Polaris had finally let out what she was holding in. She's pregnant? His eyes widened, and jaw dropped to the floor. "You're what?!" he couldn't help but scream out, uncontrollably. "But..how? You...I mean..." now it was his turn to sputter out words. He threw his hands up to his head, turning around frustratedly, letting out a groan every now and then. "I just..." he tried saying again, "How can you be pregnant? Not with me, right? I mean, I'm sorry, Polaris. I really am, but seriously. You know damn well I never wanted kids. Let alone right now!" he was furious now, and even with Polaris on the cold ground curled up in a ball, Shawn felt his need to let out his frustrations somehow. He let out a loud groan again before turning to another tree to pound his fist against it, letting out most of what he was feeling. "God dammit. What have I gotten myself into, now?" he muttered under his breath, not necessarily for Polaris to hear.
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Post by Lezzi on Mar 12, 2012 22:40:32 GMT -5
Polaris stayed in her tightly knit ball while he broke his promise and lashed out. She didn't expect him to keep it and it wasn't the first part of the promise she cared about anyways. As he neared the end of his tantrum, she got the urge to stand up and punch him in the stomach. Or knee him in the crotch. She stood up, her hands on her hips and looked a lot like her old self- the old self of her when she was pissed off and in an argumentative mood. "Excuse me, but contrary to your belief, I'm not a slut and the only person I've opened up for is you so yes, it's you. Sorry to disappoint the timing but it's not alone my fault with this." She screamed at his face, using the only breath she'd taken. "So just.....ah screw it." She wanted to continue raising her voice to yell and kick and scream like he had but she suddenly felt very weak and just didn't want to fight anymore. She fell back to the ground, curling her legs to her chest. "Fucking mood swings." She muttered to herself. she'd been having them for a while now and it just pissed her off. "I don't give a shit what you do Shawn." She said quietly. It wasn't true but if all he was going to do was stand over her and yell, she didn't want him here. "You're bleeding by the way." She said nonchalantly mentioning his fist he'd just pounded into the tree. All she had seen was red on his hand so she didn't know if it was really bleeding or just raw. She didn't care. Putting her head on her knees she let out a long groan, whimpering as she felt like falling apart. She wasn't going to cry in front of Shawn but she didn't care if she let out frustration.
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Post by Tori on Mar 12, 2012 23:12:18 GMT -5
Shawn turned back around when Polaris started lashing out on him in return. It must of been the mood swings, because the next thing he knew, she was back on the ground whimpering in her knees. He didn't even glance at his hand, though. He could feel the blood dripping down his hand and onto the ground. "I know you don't care what I do..." he said a bit more calmly, though he was gritting his teeth still, "But I do. And...as much as I want to leave you right now....arguing about how this...thing isn't mine. I'm not going back to my old self." he stepped closer to Polaris, kneeling down to her. "I told you that I wanted to change, and if this is part of me changing....then so be it." he took her hand in his grasping it firmly but still gently. "I really do like you, Rissy. And...I do care for you. A lot more than you think I do."
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Post by Lezzi on Mar 12, 2012 23:18:38 GMT -5
Polaris didn't look up, trying hard not to start arguing again when he called it a thing. it wasn't a thing. She didn't care if he wanted it or not, she was going to keep it and raise it as if she planned it all along. She flinched when she heard him get closer, looking up at him, confused by his words. Her heart skipped a beat as he took her hand and she looked at him, doing her thing where she looked in his eyes for any shed of doubt or lie. "I...I like you too Shawn." She closed her eyes, tears filling them uncontrollably. "I don't want to do this alone." She practically threw herself at his chest, just wanted him to hold her. it wasn't really going to be done alone - her family would be there to help - but she wanted Shawn there. She wanted him to help and be there for her and tell her everything would be ok. Damn it I don't even care if he's lying through his teeth, I just want him. She sniffed, trying hard to hide her face so he wouldn't see her. There was no way she was going to keep her tears in for much longer.
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Post by Tori on Mar 13, 2012 23:45:44 GMT -5
Shawn listened to her, for once, intently. But when she threw herself onto him, he, himself was startled all of a sudden. He didn't know what to do, really. So he did all he could do, and all he thought would make her somewhat comfortable, and he placed his arms over her backside, rubbing her back gently. He felt as though this was more awkward than comforting, however. He tried not to sound so awkward this time. "Rissy..." he sighed, pulling her into a more comforting hug, "You know you should know...You won't be alone. You're...you're never alone. I've been alone all my life, and I'm fucking sick of it. I don't want you to feel the same way I did...at least not anymore." he finished, bringing up his own courage by kissing her on the head gently.
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Post by Lezzi on Mar 14, 2012 7:51:15 GMT -5
Polaris was about to pull away when he finally put his arms around her. She had figured this was awkward and difficult for him but some part of her didn't really care. She wanted to be selfish for once. She bit her lip when he started talking, wrapping her arms around his middle and giving him a squeeze. "You don't know how much that means to me Shawn." She whispered, kissing his neck softly. To hear him say that was a huge relief, she at least knew he cared now. Her heart had returned to normal pace but she was still fighting back tears.
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